Right now of course this is a necessary topic of discussion.
-Some of us are not new to this idea.
-Some people identify as introverts.
-Some people choose peaceful home environments.
-Some of us have recovered from toxic relationships.
-Some of us actively seek quiet, solitude and simplicity.
One of my favorite recent learnings is Keep It Super Simple which for me is a large part of the low contact I impose on myself for certain people & situations. I actively avoid personal drama as I have survived enough of it.
Some of us choose low to no contact with the people in our lives that hoard.
Unless you know about this situation in some detail, it may seem strange. Unkind. Misunderstood. In fact some people think it means we don’t “care.”
What it really means is we care too much! We care about them and are sad. We care about us and we are glad that we escaped.
In reality it is about boundaries. Self care and being self-aware.
Many folks that hoard are focused on their stuff. Protecting the stuff. Keeping the stuff. Preserving the dysfunction that is inherent in hoarding situations. Typically there is no awareness or recognition of how harmful their hoarding behaviours are.
IF you have escaped a hoarded home you may have worked long and hard to establish your personal worth and value.
You have likely established healthy boundaries.
You have learned to preserve your mental health no matter what.
It can be far too easy to be pulled back into the dysfunction if we are not healthy ourselves.
Out of all the things I recognize establishing healthy boundaries is one of the most valuable things you can do for yourself and your peace of mind.
Sometimes, that means keeping a healthy social distance from the hoarded home and the people we love that hoard.
Tammi Moses is the founder and Chief Encouragement Officer of Homes Are For Living, LLC dba The Hoarding Solution which is a Veteran Woman Owned & Operated business located in Oak Harbor, WA.
Tammi provides virtual consultations, on-site assessments and workshops on the issue of hoarding. She believes in inspiring others to take their adversity and use it for the greater good. She is the voice of #AKOPTH-Adult Kids of Parents That Hoard. She is also a voice & advocate for #YLITH – Youth Living in The Hoard. You can connect with Tammi at firstname.lastname@example.org and on Facebook & Instagram @TheHoardingSolution.