As we wander toward another Mother’s Day it is valuable to note that not everyone can easily grab a card off the rack.
For some not much thought is needed, grab a pretty one with a relatively nice sentiment and pop it in the mail. Easy peasy.
Others struggle to find a card that actually says something more closely resembling their lived truth. We want to wish them well as evolved, distanced and somewhat healed people.
We aren’t seeking any sort of revenge or “gotcha.”
We also aren’t going to blow smoke with sentiments that don’t ring true for us.
We may recognize that our moms or motherly figures did their best, but it doesn’t mean we are willing to negate our experiences.
If your mom was unkind, abusive or neglectful, its hard to let that go. If their words continue to sting our souls or if they were rude and narcissistic, it can be hard to find a way to honor them on the occasion of Mother’s Day.
The struggle is real for those of us who survived a hoarded home. Even if we find a card that expresses our sentiments well, we hesitate to send another “thing” that adds to the hoard. Buying a gift is problematic as well and we often opt for food or an experience rather than sending another item.
While we are thankful for the gift of life that our mothers have provided, it is often a struggle to honor someone who may have been so hurtful in our formative years.
Finding a simple card that we can add our own thoughts too is often the best route. It allows us to honor them, but also lets us remain authentic in our own thoughts & feelings.
Tammi Moses is the founder and Chief Encouragement Officer of Homes Are For Living, LLC dba The Hoarding Solution which is a Veteran Woman Owned & Operated business located in Oak Harbor, WA.
Tammi provides virtual consultations, on-site assessments and workshops on the issue of hoarding. She believes in inspiring others to take their adversity and use it for the greater good. She is the voice of #AKOPTH-Adult Kids of Parents That Hoard. She is also a voice & advocate for #YLITH – Youth Living in The Hoard. You can connect with Tammi at firstname.lastname@example.org and on Facebook & Instagram @TheHoardingSolution.